Quotables

I absolutely LOVE listening to little kids with their ever growing vocabulary make sense out of the world. They say the funniest stuff. We suddenly get a window into those little brains where all kinds of things are going on..thoughts, ideas....and of course, independence, which can be wonderful and insanely frustrating. Jane has started into this stage and I've decided I need to be better at recording all the crazy stuff she says. Since we are her parents, it is of course far funnier to us than any of you, but I want to get it down so I don't forget it.

Many of her quotables make me realize how much she is listening to EVERYTHING I say.

Introducing us the other day: "My name is Jane and this is my mother, Mom."

Completely random: "I just have to turn this off so we can talk", turning off the air filter in Allison's room. I never turn the air filter off - and it has never stopped us talking before...plus, she sounded like I was in for a serious lecture.

Obssessed with choosing things: "I don't want this one right now. I want to pick a new one. Would that be so cool, Mom?"

Out of nowhere: Jane sometimes does my Pilates video with me in the afternoon. Once, during one of the stomach exercises that is particulary challenging, Jane blurts out suddenly, "This is impossible!"(sounded like "inpossipull"). No idea she knew that word, and I have never said any of the exercises were impossible. I was laughing too hard to finish the set - and my stomach muscles were grateful for it.

What's that word?: Jane comes in the bathroom one morning while I am putting in my contacts (I have HORRIBLE eyesight. I hope my kids don't inherit it. Jevan says I contaminate his gene pool). "Mom, are you putting on your phonetacks? Can I put on my phonetacks too?"


"Mom, will you splash my blanket?" (meaning, spread her blanket over her in a dramatic fashion).


What is going on in that head?:
Jane was in bed, supposedly asleep, when she started laughing really loud and hard. This went on for a few minutes, with a pause and then more laughter. I finally had to go in and see what was so funny, and she was holding Wally (her cabbage patch kid) and Minnie (her sippy-cup with a Minnie Mouse lid) close to each other. I asked her what was going on, and she said "Wally and Minnie are just talking to each other and they're being silly so I go 'Hehehehehehehehehe'..."

Learning social norms: Dad walking in the door from work "Hi Dad! I love your... book..." (must... think... of something...)

Darn sentence structure: "Mom, I have all much ready!" Meaning, don't give her anymore because she has enough already.

Love to hear: "Mom, you're so amazing!" (said when doing her hair or cleaning her room). You bet I am, kid.

Watch out - Jane's listening: "I can't zip my jacket! It won't zip....(frustrated sigh) ...WHATEVER!"

Allison is a bit of a crazy woman. She is a VERY busy one year old that is wiggly, feisty, and into everything. I tell her she's a nut all the time. At dinner one night, Jane turns to Jevan and says, "Hey Dad, do you know what?" "What, Jane?" She looks at him point blank and says, "Allie's insane." Oops. Gotta watch that.

What DOES he do all day?:
One day after Jevan left for work, Jane asked where he went. I told her he went to work. Usually that's the end of the conversation. Today, however, she asked "What's he gonna do?" "Ummm..." I answered distractedly, "I dunno. Work stuff.." not really wanting to explain to a 2 year old what Jevan does when, heck, half the time I have no idea either. Jane replied, "No. Silly Mom. He plays with puppies." What the? Well, that explains a lot then. I was wondering about all the hair on his clothes, the funny smell, and the lack of a company Christmas Party.


Another day. "Mom, is Jasper going to work?" "No, Jane. He stays here with us." Jane thinks for a moment, then with a firm voice, "He needs to go to work." Amen. Lazy dog - go earn your keep.


Exercising independence:
We have been really working on manners lately and saying things nicely. This was how she used her manners the other day. (Said in a sticky-sweet voice) "Please don't talk to me, okay, please Mom?" Meaning, don't tell me to go do something I don't want to do.


This one we hear ALL the time. She uses it on us when we are mad at her for something and are trying to disipline her.
"Jane, we don't draw on Allie's head with crayon. It hurts her." (said with a firm voice)
"Are you happy, Mom?" "No, Jane, I'm not happy. I don't like it when you hurt Allie." Jane pouts a second, then turns with a mad face and a firm voice, "Mom, BE HAPPY!" I tell her again that I am happy but not happy with Jane at the moment. Again Jane says angrily, "BE HAPPY!" It would go on like that forever if I let it. Grrrrr.....

It's all about timing: Jane likes to end lots of her sentences with "for a minute." She thinks she can pretty much get away with anything if she is doing it just "for a minute." Here are some I have heard lately.
"I'm just putting some cream (yogurt) on Allie's leg for a minute. She has an owie."
Finding a dirty, black puddle outside in the street: "I'm just going to wash my hands for a minute." Basically in order to steal any toy from Allie: "I'm just going to take this for a minute."

Crazy kid. I love her.